


Halloween

by redcandle17



Series: The Holidays [1]
Category: Mad Max Series (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-24
Updated: 2015-10-24
Packaged: 2018-04-27 19:50:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5061742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redcandle17/pseuds/redcandle17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Modern American AU. Slit spends Halloween evening at the home of Nux's new girlfriend and her sisters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Halloween

Slit wasn’t sure he was allowed back in the Rockatansky sisters’ house since his disastrous first visit, which had also been his last until now. When he’d told them, “Thank God none of you are women’s studies majors,” how was he to know that their eldest sister Angharad was away doing freaking graduate women’s studies?! But since he wasn’t going to go to some stupid college costume party, the only way he could see Nux’s stupid costume was tagging along with him.

“Not staying long,” he hastily assured the girls.

Other than all throwing him a single disdainful look, though, they didn’t seem to care about his presence. Capable was wrapped in a bathrobe and quickly whisked Nux away so the two of them could help each other dress in their stupid couples’ costume, whatever it was. Slit stole glances at Capable’s sisters, trying not to get caught staring at them.

The Dag’s costume was the weirdest, which made sense since she herself was the weirdest of the sisters. It looked like she’d fallen in a puddle of mud and then fallen again in a pile of dead autumn leaves. Or maybe she’d intentionally coated herself in mud and then rolled in a pile of leaves?

Slit had vowed to keep his mouth shut since everything he said seemed to offend Nux’s girlfriend and her sisters, but he couldn’t help it. “Are you a swamp monster?” he asked.

The Dag looked disgruntled. “I’m Mother Nature.”

He could see now that she had a wreath of thorns – dried vines? – and berries on her head. By contrast, Cheedo’s medieval-looking dress and rhinestone tiara looked almost boring.

“And you’re a princess?” he guessed.

Cheedo nodded.

Slit didn’t dare address Toast. She’d threatened to tase him if he didn’t get out of the house last time. All because when she’d accused him of staring at her tits, he’d suggested she wear a bra. It was all well and good for her to insist she had the right to be comfortable and wear – or not wear – whatever she wanted in her own home, but it was unreasonable to expect him not to notice that her nipples were perky.

“I’m a pirate,” she said, as if daring him to look at her.

Slit glanced at her briefly. The black knee-high boots, tight black pants, and ruffled white shirt wouldn’t even look like a costume if not for the eyepatch. The eyepatch she had pushed up onto her forehead rather than over an eye. It was a very lazy effort. She could at least have bought a toy parrot and glued it to her shoulder, or bought a fake hook hand to wear over her hand. They sold those, didn’t they? Slit hated Halloween, but he believed in doing something right if you were going to it at all.

He didn’t know how long it would take Capable and Nux to get into their costumes, and he felt awkward just standing there, so Slit cautiously perched on the edge of an armchair. None of the girls said anything, so after a moment, he settled back more comfortably. Halloween wasn’t something he and Nux had participated in growing up. 

It, and most other holidays, was something for soft, weak children. Col. Moore’s boys were too tough for such stupid things. They’d not only spent their Halloween evenings robbing other children of their candy, they’d done so with the full encouragement of the colonel.

Slit still couldn’t believe how the social workers and the police had overreacted when they found out the colonel was running his boy’s group home like the elite military unit he’d commanded before he retired. He was personally insulted by any insinuation that he’d been ‘robbed of his childhood’ and was grateful to the old man for raising him to be so tough. At least the old man had made the police kill him rather than letting them send him to prison. Slit missed him.

This was the first year Nux had shown any interest in celebrating Halloween, and like so many other things, it was entirely the fault of his new girlfriend. Nux was so whipped, he’d agreed to wear a costume that matched Capable’s. Worse, he seemed genuinely excited about it.

But surely Nux hadn’t known what his costume would be, or he wouldn’t be descending the stairs in a spandex bodysuit. No, it was worse than that. It wasn’t just a blue spandex bodysuit. Nux was wearing a yellow spandex bikini brief over the bodysuit. Slit pulled out his phone and snapped a photo before Nux could stop him.

Nux glared at him defiantly as Capable came down behind him. She was also dressed in a spandex bodysuit, but it didn’t look as silly on her as it did on Nux. Her red hair was loose around her shoulders instead of in the messy braids she usually wore, and it was what helped Slit identify what the hell she and Nux were supposed to be.

“Jean Grey and Cyclops?!” he exclaimed. “Fuck. You could have at least dressed like the movie version.”

“Shut up, Slit,” Nux muttered.

“The cartoon was better,” Capable said, unruffled. She stuck a pair of sunglasses on Nux. It was already dark despite not even technically being night yet. Slit supposed Capable would be acting as Nux’s guide. He smirked. He didn’t care how hot a girl was or how great the sex probably was, he’d never let any girl make him do something so stupid.

The doorbell rang and Toast pushed her eyepatch down before going to answer it. She took one of the platters of caramel apples with her.

The Dag picked up another platter and offered it to Slit. “Have one. The apples are organic, and I melted cane sugar to make the caramel myself.”

“It took all night last night,” Cheedo said. She sounded more resentful than proud, and Slit suspected she didn’t care as much as the Dag did about the caramel being homemade.

It did taste pretty good though. Still, Slit couldn’t fathom why the hell anyone would go through all that trouble just to give the things away to a bunch of brats who’d probably be disappointed it wasn’t a Snickers bar.

It was only after Nux and Capable had left that Slit realized he was stuck. He’d assumed Nux would give him his keys so he could drive home. But Nux had left with his car, stranding Slit at Casa Rockatansky. He’d probably done it intentionally, as revenge for laughing at his stupid costume. The bastard. Slit scrolled through his contacts list, looking for someone he could bully into coming to pick him up.

The doorbell rang again and Toast headed to the door again. Slit followed her, figuring he should leave before they threw him out.

“Cool costume, bro,” the dad dressed as the grim reaper said, while his brat tried to take _two_ caramel apples. “You’re that psycho from that one slasher movie, right? I forget the name.”

Slit didn’t say anything. He took out his switchblade and flipped it open.

The brat shrieked like he’d performed some cool trick.

Slit stuck the knife into one of the apples in the brat’s sticky hands. “One,” he said.

They left, but another group was walking towards the house. Toast stayed on the porch with her platter. Slit felt compelled to eat the apple he’d speared. Wouldn’t be right to put it back and let someone else take it. He cleaned and sharpened his knife regularly, but Morsov’s germs might still be on it.

“You must get that a lot,” Toast commented.

“Only on Halloween. Rest of the time, people are usually too scared to say anything unless they’re drunk.”

She made a sound that could mean anything. Then she said, “There’s not enough for all those people. Go bring another tray.”

Slit went back inside and grabbed another platter of caramel apples. When he returned, one of the masked adults tried to take an apple. “Children only,” he snapped. 

“Grimy, man,” the guy said. 

“You’re setting a bad example for your kid,” Slit snarled. He balanced the platter on one palm and reached for his knife, but before he could draw it, he felt Toast’s hand on his arm. He settled for glaring at the asshole in the cheap mask until the whole lot of them had left. 

“The adults are worse than the kids,” Toast said. 

Slit followed her back into the house, intending to set down the platter and leave. Only then sounded the roar of motorcycles and the Dag and Cheedo gave an excited scream and ran to the door. 

“Valkyrie and the Vuvalini are going for a midnight ride,” Cheedo called excitedly, though it was several hours before midnight . “Are you coming, Toast?”

“Someone has to give out the candied apples,” Toast grumbled loudly. 

Slit tried to follow the two girls out of the house, but he felt someone grab the collar of his jacket. 

“I’m not doing this alone,” Toast said. 

Slit took off his jacket and laid it on the back of the armchair closest to the door. He was about to ask Toast if she really wanted him here, but then he decided against reminding her of the last time he’d been here. 

The television had been on all this time, but it had been muted. Toast turned the volume back on and stretched out on the couch. Slit cautiously perched on the armchair again. _Elvira: Mistress of the Dark_ was showing. The girls he’d known who celebrated Halloween had usually dressed as Elvira. For that matter, even stuck-up uptight girls usually wore slutty outfits for Halloween. Capable’s sisters hadn’t gotten that memo though. 

“Your facial scars, another gang did that to you, right?”

“Yeah,” Slit replied. “Another gang cut your hair like that, right?”

“Cutting my hair was cathartic,” she said, but she looked embarrassed, like she was sorry she’d asked about his scars. 

The doorbell rang again and Toast looked at him expectantly. Slit grabbed a platter of caramel apples and gave them away to ungrateful beggars. 

“Your sisters are too nice. These brats will be happy with any piece of mass-produced corn syrup.”

“They didn’t get to do the whole ‘trick or treat’ thing when they were kids. Their parents were members of Joe’s cult when they were born or joined when they were little. Halloween was something they saw on TV when they became his wives and got to watch TV.”

“But not you?” Slit asked. 

“I was a normal kid from an almost normal family. A lot of kids born into the cult were deformed or sick, and he preached the divinity of the beautiful and the healthy, so some of his followers kidnapped me and gave me to him as a gift. You know, so he could have another healthy, pretty little girl to bear him healthy sons.”

Slit was horrified. Nux had mentioned that Capable had had a really sheltered and conservative upbringing, but that was a hell of a lot different than letting him know she’d been part of a cult!

Toast laughed at him. “Yeah, we were ‘sister wives’ - what, you thought we were actual sisters?!”

“I thought some of you were from your mom’s previous marriage and some of you were from your dad’s previous marriage,” Slit said weakly. 

“I don’t know whether that makes you extremely stupid or whether it’s endearing that you tried to be understanding.”

Slit couldn’t even be offended. He felt too repulsive for having noticed that all four of them were hot. Fuck. Did noticing that she hadn’t been wearing a bra last time he was here make him as vile as this ‘Joe’ character?!

“Hhhmmmp,” she said, which might have meant anything. 

She didn’t get up when the next set of trick-or-treaters came, and by the set after them, Slit had accepted that he was here to hand out the candy. He gave the last batch of brats dollar bills from his wallet and turned off the porch light as well as the lights in the hallway and the living room. 

Toast had fallen asleep. No one had responded to any of his texts, and in any case, Slit wouldn’t have felt right leaving Capable’s tiniest sister alone like this. He ate the last two caramel apples, and changed the channel when the Elvira movie finished and the local news started. 

When the doorbell rang again, Slit found a bunch of teenagers in regular clothes instead of costumed little kids. 

“Trick or treat!” they screeched. 

“Halloween’s over. ‘Sides you’re not kids and you’re not wearing costumes.”

“We’ll egg _and_ TP this house, mister,” threatened a kid almost his size. 

Slit grabbed the kid by the lapels of his stupid high school letterman jacket. “You’re wearing your school jacket, dumbass. You think I won’t remember your face? It ain’t as memorable as mine, but I’ll remember. Anything happen to this house - anything at all - and I’ll find you and give you a smile like mine. Got it?”

The dumb teenage jock nodded wordlessly. 

“Anything at all. I don’t care if you didn’t do it. Tell the other little brats. Anything happens to this house or these girls and I’ll find _you_. Got it?”

The kid nodded so much that Slit let him go out of fear he’d get whiplash. No one else rang the doorbell after that. Slit let himself drift off to sleep, awakening who-knows-how-long later when he heard the roar of motorcycle engines and then the sound of feminine laughter and someone attempting to open the door. 

He went to the front door and found the Dag and Cheedo. They were clearly drunk. The motorcycle gang who’d dropped them off roared away once they’d stumbled into the house. 

Toast roused long enough to grumble, “Where were you?” before falling asleep again.

The Dag was wearing the rhinestone tiara and Cheedo was wearing the thorn/vine wreath. Slit steered them both into the kitchen and filled two glasses full of cold tap water. 

“Drink,” he said. 

Both girls guzzled down the water without objection. Slit found a can of soup in a cupboard and emptied it into a shallow pot. He covered the pot with a plate and showed the girls a clip of Morsov being lame while he waited for the soup to heat. 

He poured equal amounts of salty canned soup into two bowls and set them down on the kitchen table. “Eat.”

“This is toxic,” the Dag complained. 

Slit smirked at her. “So’s whatever you were drinking.” They’d thank him tomorrow when they didn’t feel like dying from hangovers. 

They ate the soup and drank more water, and then the Dag set the tiara on his head and kissed both his cheeks before he managed to convince them to go up to bed. Slit was honestly tired by the time he settled back into his armchair. 

Toast was still asleep. Slit turned off the television and got up long enough to grab the fancy blanket from off the back of the sofa and drape it over her. He decided the carpeted floor was probably more comfortable than that armchair and laid down. 

He wasn’t sure how much time had passed before he heard the door opening. Slit crouched and slid open his switchblade before he realized it was Nux and Capable trying to be quiet. He closed the knife and put it away before turning on a table lamp. 

“Sorry,” Capable whispered, apparently not surprised to find him still in her house. 

“Where have you been?” Slit demanded. True, he didn’t know what time it was, but it felt late. 

Nux was holding a cardboard box, but it was Capable who answered him, after reaching into the box and taking out a small, dark thing.

“We were on our way home when we saw some kids tormenting this poor little guy. Just because he’s a black cat! Can you imagine the ignorance of some people?!”

“We took him to a twenty-four vet,” Nux said. 

“He’s just a baby,” Capable said, stroking the kitten. 

Slit was more a dog person than a cat person, but he liked animals of all species more than he liked homo sapiens. “I hope you gave them a dose of what they gave him,” he said to Nux.

Nux nodded grimly, and Capable had a righteous look on her face, like she’d fully approved of whatever Nux had done to the kitten-torturing monsters. He dug into his pocket and then handed his car keys to Slit. “Going to stay here tonight,” he said. 

Slit took the keys. He fully intended to take Nux’s car and drive home, but it just didn’t feel right to leave. Everyone was either distraught over an abused kitten, drunk, or asleep and also traumatized enough to insist some guy she didn’t even like stay so she wouldn’t be alone. He couldn’t in good conscience leave them. 

Slit double-checked that the front door was locked and all the lights were off, before lying down on the floor again. He was impressed with himself. He was the most mature, grown up person here.


End file.
